pig iron
No sonnet today. I think the last one blew a fuse. Here, this is last night's phone conversation.
[Ring.]
LMO: Hello?
ME: Hi.
LMO: Oh, I was just going to call you. Here, hang on.
SLK: I guess I'm supposed to talk to you.
ME: Oh, all right. What are you doing?
SLK: Eating a slice of pizza.
ME: What kind?
SLK: Pepperoni and onion.
ME: Oh, you've gone back to mammals?
SLK: What's that?
ME: You've gone back to mammals?
[Thirty second silence.]
SLK: Um.
[Twenty second silence.]
SLK: Well, I.
[Thirty second silence.]
SLK: So yes.
ME: Oh, sorry. I thought you were talking to someone else in the room.
SLK: No, no.
ME: Right.
SLK: It's just that there's a lot to keep track of. There's music. And there's a cat.
ME: One needs tactics to deal with these things. A constantly evolving tactical strategy. Like Rommel, the desert fox.
SLK: Huh.
ME: That sort of rapid response.
SLK: I thought he just kicked a lot of ass.
ME: But I think he did it in a supple way. I don't know. I'm an indifferent student of twentieth century military history.
SLK: I don't even try, really.
ME: It's probably best that way. Where did Lauren go?
SLK: She was outside, or smoking, or... it's been a night like that. It's been a night of three-legged cats and relationship issues.
ME: I see.
SLK: [Away from mouthpiece.] No, I just thought that was the best way to describe it.
ME: Should I call back later?
SLK: [Away from mouthpiece.] Should he call back later? Okay, here she is.
LMO: Don't I have the best receptionist?
ME: That conversation made no sense.
LMO: Sorry if that was sketchy. I just found out that both of you were going to be in town and decided to throw you at one another.
ME: Oh. Wait, was that Stewart?
LMO: Who did you think it was?
ME: I thought it was Joe.
LMO: No. He left today.
ME: Oh. Oh. Well, that explains things.
LMO: Sorry.
ME: Oh.
